hurts after hurts *

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Sunday ,

met Cindy at phoenix mrt station. then we went tuh jurong point tuh buy her things. wth , she see 1 shop then go in see. wahs , you noe jurong point how many shops mahs? imagine how many shops i have tuh go in? Zzz lo. then i gollow her go Pepper Lunch eat. then went tuh buy subway for ahwyn & jonas , jiu head tuh meet them lerhs. then we slacked at wyn house , till 3plusPM then i head back home lerhs. reached home at abt 5 plus. then went tuh change lerhs , jiu rushed down tuh work lerhs. worked till 10plus PM , then pei my colleague ShaSha slack at tam. she wanna wait for her fren tuh come and fetch her. so i pei her till 12midnight , then i rush for my last bus home lerhs. reached home at abt 12plus luhs. TIRED !!! then went tuh bath then slp lerhs.

Monday ,

went tuh meet jonas at aljunied mrt platform at 7plus. then tgt we trained down tuh ahwyn's house. then we slacked , & they do whatever they wanted , romance and all. hahahah ! while i at there be gooseberry. LOL ! Sorry wor ! xD then slacked and talked tuh wyn's mom till 3plus . then me and Cindy trained down tuh Lot One walk walk. then went tuh her grandpa house sitsit awhile jiu go home lerhs. reached home at abt 6plus. then pei my dad sitsit at th coffeeshop till 8plus jiu go back lerhs. bathed lerhs , toked tuh Cindy on th phone. wahs , i very sot her siahs. WTH =.= nvm , shan't say much at here. just very sot , yes very very sot ! Dx rang wo kong huan xi yi chang )): then slept at 11plus PM. wahs , really very very very very very tired luhs !!! arghs ~!
~out of a sudden , i just found her so hong. haish. ~

Tuesday ,

woke up at 6:21AM. then still have tuh wait for my bro tuh finish bathing , then can bath. so too late lerhs , i dint go sch. hahahahas. went back tuh slp :D Zzz~ then woke up again at 12noon. hahas. still tired though =X then ate mom cook derhs porridge :D bath & went tuh bedok inter tuh buy smth , then back home again. after that , trained down tuh CCK ALONE ! wahs , how sian lahs ! went tuh Cindy house sitsit awhile , then we tgt go Lot One , AGAIN ! Zzz. Cindy wanna buy her things. then we trained down tuh wyn house. slacked at wyn house while Cindy was dyeing her UNSUCCESSFUL hair. LOL! Lousy siahs. Hahahahhahas. Useless$20 hair dye dint eat in her hair. LOL. Jonas helped her cye. so gd hor. what a nice Buatoh i have. Very sot her lahs actually , but we talked things out lerhs , so now okays lerhs. :)))

Buatoh , i hope you will think over what i have said , & if my words have been a little too harsh , i'm Sorry. cos i was really very angry. anw , paiseh lahs.

Then me and Cindy left wyn hse at 8plus. Cindy trained home & so did i. reached home at 9plusPM. mom came back and me and my mom had a BIGBIG fight , ever ! shit derhs luhs. she kp nevermind lehs , still wanna use violence on me siahs ! wth ! damn fucking angry and shouted at her. but i never hit back lahs. just had struggle with her , and was quite violent towards her back. ended up , my face , gone case. dont noe why , or when , my face got her fingernail scratched derhs scar. WTH ! face lehs ! wahs , sot siahs. this morning then realise derhs. so went tuh put on a plaster luhs. hopefully by tmr can go off bahs. haish. then after th LONG and HUGE fight , we both ended up in tears. =.= then bath and slp lerhs. too tired tuh carry on.

Today ,

woke up at 6AM , as per normal. bathed and trained down tuh find Cindy at Cck. then went tuh her house there derhs coffeeshop eat prata with her, as our breakfast. Hahas:D then went ard her neighbourhood tuh slack , so sian lahs cans ! wth. went tuh slack at th playgrd and played swing. hahahahas ! childish rights? not me, its her intention ! xP then went tuh her hse downstairs and slack again. well , time with her just passed so fast ! then she went up tuh change , and i was left alone there. so sians , then i vandalised th wall , and th chair. hahahs ! just being bored out of a sudden. hahahahas. then she came down , changed and ready tuh go and fetch her cousin from sch. so we walked and bused down tuh Unity Sec tuh wait for her cousin. then tgt me , Cindy and her cousin bused down tuh her cousin hse. th 3 of us , went in her cousin rm. and she and her cousin was busy playing com , while , me , doing nth , just lying down there and watch them play luhs. siansss ~ then head back home at abt 4plus. When i was climbing up th stairs tuh take LRT back tuh CCK mrt , i suddenly felt so breathless, and was panting , worst than how a dog pant. coughing like hell , was having alot of cold sweat, sweat till my whole shirt also wet wet derhs.. and just , idk , but i noe there is a big prob with my body, my lungs. then a aunt saw me coughing till so jialat and so out of breathe , she kept looking at me , scared i would faint? LOL. i so strong , wont faint derhs lahs. reached home at 6plus and chatted with Cindy online. webcam somemore ! hahahahas. well , finally , i told her what i always wanted tuh tell her. but not everything lahs. basically just those things that came tuh my mind at that point of time.

basically , today i was just like Coughing and Coughing and Coughing , Breathless & Breathless & Breathless. i noe for sure , there is a serious prob with my heart , body , or lungs? either one or smth like that. that time derhs heart test result , i still haven go back tuh my doctor there and ask. dont dare tuh ask too. suddenly i just felt so scared , really very scared. but i noe , tmr , i will and have tuh go back tuh see th doctor again. hopefully nothing goes wrong bahs. suddenly , everything is just so scary. im afraid , for once , im afraid... really very afraid that , i cant take care of her anymore, cant see her anymore. i really really dont wan this tuh happen. i dont want ! i dont want tuh leave her, i noe she needed someone. Pls , i really hope tmr everything will be fine. haish.

Today i met her , in fact spent th whole day with her. & i noe for sure , that i still love her. at times i just wished that she would be th last time SWEET her , that she claimed that she used tuh be. maybe , if i have known th last time SWEET her , i wouldnt have suffered from all those hurts that i have been suffering all along bahs. i just hate it , th fact that i have fallen for now derhs her , a BIAO MIAN SHANG so COLD and CRUEL derhs Cindy. haish. How i wished , that i could fell th sweetness that i have longed tuh fell all along. haish. but just too bad , she isn't th sweet her that she was anymore. For now , i just hope that if ever , i cant be there tuh take care of her anymore , she will learn tuh be more independent , more self-loved , more wise in spending money , & open up her big eyes and see who is th TRUE ONES who treat her good , GENUINELY. i dont wanna say much , or judge anything, just hope that she could see for herself. Girl , you must be strong , and take care of yourself okays? I always love you , and I will always do. Bear that in mind. EmersonRisse ,, 090908 ,, i'm still counting on th days when ILOVEYOU.

SCREAMED at Wednesday, October 21, 2009