hurts after hurts *

Saturday, May 23, 2009

CONFUSE CONFUSE CONFUSE...

hellos. im here tuhh update again lerhs. hahas. finally my exams are over lerhs. hahas. RELAX lerhs. heh heh. well , had my POA exams on thurs. well, i MUST get 100 marks mans. i dont care. even if i cant get 100marks , i must get ABOVE 95 mans. hahas. actually i have a dream tuhh be an accountant tuhh earn as much money as i can in th future. i simply LOVES money mans. hahas. this world is realistic though. hahas. i wanna be RICH lahs. hahas. i will work hard towards my goal derhs. hahas. well. this week theres nth much happening luhs. hahas. guess what, im having crushes everywhere. some here and some there. hahas. dont noe why also lahs. hahas. aiyahs, currently cant find anyone who is TRUE and SERIOUS so no point me being serious also mahs. hahas. rite? hahas. having alot of CONFUSE feeling now. haish. VERY LUAN lahs. well , im afraid that my feeling for one of my EX will come back lehs. i dont noe also lahs. My that EX now have BF lerhs , and i noe i should not let my feeling for her come back. but she and her BF derhs RS also not very stable. haish. COMPLICATED lahs. haish. seeing her suffering in her RS with her current BF simply makes me feel so heartpain for her mans. haish. i dont wanna see her being trapped in th COMPLICATED and UNFIXED RS with her bf luhs. but what can i say or do? haish. anw im thankful enuf that she is now my best fren lahs. hahas. and i simply love her in what ever way..:)) in dorm , i think i having some passing feeling with a gal. lols. dont noe also lahs. but that gal is str8 , so i tink just forget it. its just passing cloud niahs mahs. hahas. saw cindy on friday. i walked pass th dining hall cos i was on th way tuh see doc. then saw her and she saw me too. then she GIN at me. nb, what i do siahs? arghs fuck lahs. then this cass' attitude towards me has changed. fuck mans. told you lerhs , every gal also like that. i dont wanna give a fuck anymore lerhs. haish. feeling like breaking up with her luhs. she has not been able tuhh prove tuhh me that she really love me. ytd , cass ask me tuhh shut up when i pass a joking remark saying that she changed lerhs. nabei. she wasnt like this before derhs luhs. haish. i still tot of doing smth for her for me and her 1 month anni which is 4 days later. but i think now no need lerhs lahs. argh. fuck care lahs. maybe see until after me and her one month anni , she still like this mahs , if she still like this , im just gonna BREAK with her lerhs. yeahs yeahs. that will do. i gave her a chance lerhs , but if she dont wanna treasure it , too bad luhs. hahas. abt K.Q , maybe will try out with her when she is out bahs. hahas. maybe if me and cass break lerhs , i will give K.Q a chance bahhs? hahas. give her a chance tuh prove tuhh me that she is TRUE tuhh me bahs? hahas. dont noe yet lahs. haish. but at th back of my mind , i do wanna be with my EX. haish. as for CINDY , i reallu dont noe what tuh say lerhs. after reading her blog. haish. i cant say that i have fully forgotten abt her but im in th process of forgetting her lerhs. i dont think of her as often as i used tuhh lerhs. haish. although there is still times when i will think of her , but not so often lerhs lahs. hahas. have been focusing on smth else thats why. hahas. shall stop toking abt LOVE lerhs bahs. hahas. hmms, i cant wait for my results mans. hahas. feeling so anxious mans. hahas. just now i went tuhh see th doc inside, then came out at 3 plus. thats late luhs. knn. th staff in gal home told me mother tuh come and fetch me at 9 am but th staff dint tell my mom that i cant come out at 9am cos i need tuhh see doc first and can only come out at 1030am. nb rite? so my mom say she is not free tuh wait till 1030 am. then she came at 3 plus tuhh fetch me luhs. shag. so late then can come out. haish. dint go anywhere today. hahas. lazy. lols. later my LOVER coming over tuh my house lehs. she having some probs with her bf bahs i think. hahas. well , i will always be here for her derhs mahs. hahas. kaes lahs. i shall end here lerhs. hahas. take care peeps. shall update again soon. byes:)

hellos. im back tuhh blog lerhs. hahas. just now met my LOVER lerhs. then she pei me tuhh go tuh atm tuh transfer money. however, she look very sad too. haish. she dint tok much tuh me lahs. haish. she having some prob with her bf bahs. haish. it hurts me tuh see her like that luhs. haish. so sad and suffering. haish. but i cant do anything. cant be of help. haish. alot of things came into my mind when i see her upset face. haish.

"maybe she wont have tuhh go through all these if me and her dint break? "
"maybe she would be happier if we could go back tuh th past? cos at least i wont hurt her this way and she wont be this hurt."

but no point thinking all these lerhs lahs. me and her derhs thing is in th past lerhs. and i dont think me and her can ever go back tuh th past anymore lerhs. exactly th past. NEVER lerhs bahs. haish. then i pei her tuh go buy bubble tea. then go huhu. after that i send her tuh th bus stop quite a distance away tuhh take bus tuhh meet her bf. haish. actually initially she dint want me tuh pei her tuh th bus stop derhs , cos its quite a distance away, but i insisted , so she relented. then i pei her go bus stop luhs. haish. she look so glum today. haish. so after she left, i went home luhs. haish. and here i am, blogging again. haish. i miss her. haish. wondering what she doing now. hows her and her bf... haish. hope they are ok bahs. shall end here lerhs. tired lerhs. take care peepos. shall update again soon bahs. byes:)

Labels: LOST and SO CONFUSED...

SCREAMED at Saturday, May 23, 2009